howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - Middle lane arguments
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/arguments.htm
Classic Middle Lane arguments. Next time you're down the pub arguing with someone as to why they should use the left lane, point them to this page. Here are a list of the classic idiot's middle lane arguments and their appropriate response. 1 If I'm doing 70mph then anyone overtaking me is breaking the law. The fact is that you use the left lane unless overtaking and it really is as simple as that. It's ironic that the simplest of rules is incomprehensible for the simplest of brains. If you get blocked i...
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - The Red Light District
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/redlight.htm
Crazy mo' fo's Fools. Crazy red distant disco lights. How to drive without a brain. The red light driver shares many traits with the repmobile. Yet there is one key element that singles out this type of driver as a red lighter rather than a rep: stupidity. A red lighter is a genuine dunce who knows no better than to follow the car in front too closely. Indicates they want to join the queue in the big boys' lane. Hell, they could miss Ricky beating Bianca to death with a haddock in Eastenders! One tiny ad...
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - The Middle Lane Hogger. The cardinal sin of the motorway!
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/middle_lane.htm
Almost everyone can apply. The ones in the middle lane! I read in The News of the World that the inside lane¹ is for lower class people and lorry drivers. It's full of degenerates, I'm not going there. The people behind me can wait. Police marksmen take aim, about time too. The culprits are the fat slobs of the motorway world, sweaty burger eating fast food pie thieves. There's nothing more annoying that being forced to follow a middle-laner for a while, they then pull over (hallelujah praise the tar...
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - Fog lights
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/foglights.htm
Approaching wall of piercing light. Culture beat: Mr Vain. I know what I want. And I want it now. I want you, cause I'm Mr. Vain. Fog lights are the Burberry of the motorway. Once upon a time they were exclusive accessories on cars, but now every sod seems to have them, and they want any excuse to show the whole world too. It's fog light time! Allowed² to do is point our accusing fingers at the active fog light imbecile. I can sometimes forgive xenon. The most effective use of fog lights I can think of&s...
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - I can still seam your full beam, idiot! Stop blinding me on the motorway!
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/full_beam.htm
An approaching glow in the distance. Why is that ghastly chap flashing me? I wonder if it's because I've got my full beam on? No it can't be, he's a good 20ft away on the other carriageway. tum de dum. For some unknown reason I'm frequently blinded on dual carriageways by morons who seem to believe that because they're on a wider road than normal they can use their full beam regardless of oncoming traffic on the other carriageway. Why they think this is a complete mystery to me. Someone please sit these ...
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - Home page - Not suitable for motorway morons!
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/index.htm
New: Middle lane arguments. No one is perfect on the motorway. Agreed. But. Is looking at the opposite end of the almost comical scale. In fact we're looking so far down the scale that you probably can't see the "perfect" end of the driving scale that we're considering; it's a pin-prick in the distance, obscured by the glare of xenon lights. Join the howmotorwayswork community and have your say. If you like the site, feel free to leave a comment. It to a friend, or send an email. By Donna Street 2011.
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - The HGV driver
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/hgv.htm
Males, Lumberjacks, French women. Easy to spot - they're the chaps in the lorries. Snowman signing off, ten four rubber duck, over and out. There's a pecking order on the roads and HGVs are very near the top. The majority can often be observed dominating and bullying other cars on the motorway. It's not surprising you want to move out of the way of a 40 tonne machine driven by what seems like an axe-wielding maniac. The lorry drivers don't care. Why should they? They didn't introduce the stupid limiter&#...
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - Rubber Neckers on the Motorway, or is it RubberNeckers? They're all idiots!
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/rubber_neck.htm
Ooooo, that car looks like Mr Richardson's. Look at the nice Fireman cutting him out. Ooooo that looks like it might have smarted a little, however that blue jumper doesn't go with his earth coloured trousers, oh my god that's Mrs Jefferson unconcious in the passenger seat! Ooooo, they'll be interested in this at the council meeting. Side of the motorway. Nobody was hurt in the making of this site. You have your own life, get on with it and stop causing a backlog of traffic for no reason. Rule 238: You s...
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
How Motorways Work - The Caravan User
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/caravan.htm
Older, leather skin, often beardy. Rover 75, Omega. Oscillating wildly out of control. Take a plane to the south of spain? Rent a large apartment and a car? Hell no, let's take the caravan and waste some quality time! Receipe for summer-baked caravan disaster. Take 250ft-lb of uber-torque (can be obtained from just about any good common rail diesel store). Connect with a large cube of hollow plastic with the road holding prowess of spam. Fill car with an equal amount of intelligence. And don't even get m...
howmotorwayswork.co.uk
Motorway information, How Motorways Work
http://howmotorwayswork.co.uk/motorway.htm
A motorway can be a daunting place to be driving, especially for the beginner driver or someone who isn't naturally confident behind the wheel. Full of fast moving heavy goods vehicles, aggressive drivers, over inflated egos and plain old stupidity, it's hardly surprising that a lot of people tend to switch off and just stick to the middle lane, with the misconception that it is the easy route or the safest place to be. So how do we deal with these pests? Contrary to popular belief it is NOT illegal to u...